Two Questions

To all the Talibangelicals out there that love to talk about how us homogaysexuals are ruining the sanctity of marriage and that the Bible tells them so, I have two questions.

1) Are you completely and one-hundred percent fluent in Hebrew, Aramaic, Greek, Latin, French, German and English. Because when you spout off about Leviticus and whatnot, that's roughly the translation route that you have to go through to get from the Original Hebrew to your King James version.

2) Can you honestly speak with a straight face and proclaim that you are speaking for your G-d, or even presume to know what the Almighty thinks and believes? Because if you do, you're essentially equating yourself to G-d and that my friends, I find sacrilegious.

Essentially, I don't care what you think about the Bible and Leviticus and what you think that G-d intended to say. So until you can satisfy me by answering these questions, Screw You.

Today is World AIDS Day Too

Today marks the day after twentieth anniversary of the first announcement of what is annually commorated as World AIDS Day. I deliberately didn't post anything yesterday because I have a lot to say about AIDS. Having worked a substantial portion of my career in this field, I have a lot to say on the subject, sometimes not always nice. I’ve been contemplating over the past week or so some format of how to articulate everything that I want to say about this issue, but it’s honestly just too much, so this post from here on is a random sampling.

It bothers me how much people still don’t know about HIV and AIDS, and yes the really are two different things. HIV, or human immunodeficiency virus, is the literal virus that causes AIDS or Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome. AIDS is a syndrome or a collection of symptoms that are related, in and of itself it’s not a disease. It causes me great pain when reporters and others talk about the HIV virus (its redundant—human immunodeficiency virus virus) or the AIDS virus. Here we are 25 years later and common little mistakes bother me.

It bothers me that gay men are so complacent about HIV these days and that barebacking is accepted as a norm without much challenge. It bothers me even more that many people, me included, often turn a blind eye to crystal meth use and its impact on the spread of this disease. It bothers me that some gay men are too selfish to not to wear a condom or ask a simple question. I guess ignorance can be bliss. But as much of a pain in the ass it is, I like to know my status and get tested every six months.

I remember having a conversation with a fresh faced, newly out gay a few years back that involved me attempting to give him a condom when it became very apparent that he and a good friend of mine were going to hook up. He basically asked me if my friend was HIV positive and I responded that I have no idea, but he should be prepared. Long and short this poor kid who’s never buried someone responded, “Its ok, you just take a few pills, besides he doesn't look sick.” I, in term, had a meltdown. Sure, you can take a few pills, many a day for the rest of your life. These pills are fun and cause temperature spiking, violent diarrhea, stomach cramps, body fat distribution and a whole host of other complications. But that seems to be a standard gay response; I’ll just take a few pills and be ok. I still get a little miffed when I hear of a twenty-something who is positive, dude you grew up with this shit, it's not like you don't know anything.

It scares me to think that countries around the world are repeating the same mistakes that the US made early in the epidemic. Here AIDS was once associated with the 4-H club, no not the school aged group, but Homosexuals, Heroine Users, Hemophiliacs and Haitians. No one else was affected and therefore was free to ignore the issue. These patterns are being repeated around the world in sub-Saharan Africa, in India and China and Russia without any regard to the countless number of lives that are being lost.

I hate the fact that women have no effective prevention methods that don’t involve condom negotiation. Women, especially in developing countries have to negotiate, often with their own husbands and in unequal power relationships to protect themselves. Violence and rape often occur when a woman breaches the subject of condoms. The world rapidly needs a viable microbicide.

I once gave a quote at the 14th International Conference on AIDS in Barcelona that still haunts me, but I actually think it may be proving true…"There is the whole notion that AIDS is over in the United States, that it's not a problem any more. Prevention messages are not working. We do have gay men barebacking. We have risk groups sharing needles again. We've got heterosexuals that have no idea what's going on. We have a whole generation of people under the age of 30 that don't remember the AIDS epidemic, that think it's nothing more than, 'Hell, you take a couple of pills and you'll be fine. Things are going to have to get worse again before they'll ever get better, Resistant HIV, an explosion of HIV, something may go wrong with the medications, we’re nowhere near over."

So here we are, twenty-seven years into the epidemic and what have we learned. This little beastie isn’t going anywhere. Bill Clinton works on the issue almost full time at his Foundation; President Bush’s Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief may actually be the high point of his Presidency. The governments of the world are finally paying attention; it’s just that the rest of us are not. I’m not sure what’s worse, the early days when the New York Times ran six stories of AIDS and 54 stories about deaths from contaminated Tylenol in a year or now, when we just turn our heads and look the other way except on World AIDS Day, but it scares me so very, very much. So Happy World AIDS Day, part redux, I hope that we can somehow, somewhere make a difference.

A New Year

I haven't had much to say of late, largely because the elections have had me working overtime. That being said it's my annual ritual of noting that I'm officially one-half through my expected lifetime. Yeah it's the big day.

It's another big day here in DC!



Yup, it always coincides near my birthday, the DC Drag Races. For those of you not familiar, a bunch of DC gays, and a few straight boys don drag and have a foot race down 17th street, also referred to as the gay runway. It used to be a fun event, but somehow the hetero ladies from the dirty vag discovered that the gays like to put on a show and they all descend wanting cosmos and what not for a Carrie Bradshaw, let's try to be inherently hip and hang with the gays kind of evening. That and they bring their spawn in their baby strollers of death and try to cram about 7000 people in three blocks. It's good times. Yeah right.

I think this is the first year in six or seven that I'm not guest bar tending at one of the establishments. Usually it's good money, but with the birthday celebration and me just being old and grumpy, I declined all invitations.

So for the children going out to the high heel races I have a couple of recommendations.

1) Have fun but please chill out, you are going to be served your drink in a plastic cup. The Hispanic dishwashers that every establishment employs can't keep up with washing glasses while you are binge drinking over three hours.

2) Bring cash, virtually no bartender is going to attempt to remember which of the 300 new faces belong to a new credit card. It's a fact and there will be no tabs tonight.

3) Yes the prices are going to be jacked up tonight, regular customers get over it, you should know after 25 years that this is going to happen, and you're not getting any special treatment either. No special martini requests and don't plan on eating your dinner at the bar, NOT GONNA HAPPEN.

4) Hetero ladies, leave your evil spawn at home with the husband or hire a baby sitter. This event is about the gays and your innocent children will witness some horrifying event like two boys holding hands. If you don't think your kids can handle it, don't bring them.

5) Hetero boys, yes all those pretty ladies are in fact dudes, except for the one pre-op transgender lady that will be roller blading in a thong and have on pasties, she's the real deal, but will probably rob ya while she's blowing ya, so give it up. Oh yeah, like the kids, if you're coming to Gay Street, then you need to be prepared to be hit on, take it as a compliment and move on with your life.

6) Everyone, like I said earlier, have fun, but chill the eff out. It's about three hours of debauchery with way too many people and we bartenders will remember how you acted a fool and the next time, you'll get a full glass of tonic with a splash of vodka. Every bartender will be bitter tonight because we can't keep up with the demands.

So that's it, y'all have fun at the race, I'll be watching the Phillies finally try and pull off the series.

Tina and Ike

So I'm totally thinking that we shold recruit Tina Turner to do a charity, fundraising concert for all those on the Gulf coast who endured the most recent hurricane, cause you know, she survived Ike's thrashing too.

The Sarah Palin Baby Name Generator

Ok folks this is brilliant!

Ever wonder what would happen if you had been birthed by Sarah Palin? Well now you can know your name.

Check it out for a good laugh or two.

Sincerely,

Tangle Jig Palin

Still With You

Seven years.

It still brings a tear to my eye. It's still the reason that I loathe Atlanta. I was there in Buckhead at a meeting with the CDC when my cell phone kept ringing. It was the same number five times in a row. I didn't recognize the number, but decided to step out and field the call. Walking through the lobby of that dreaded hotel, I saw the second plane crash into the tower on the giant TV.

My uncle was in there. He wasn't just an uncle, he was my big brother of sorts. I had followed in his footsteps. I had broken that mold. I too, was gay.

He was the man who took me under his wing, helped me come out, took me out and about in New York.

He was in the second tower.

Pull yourself together, he's going to make it out. Compose yourself, you need to let the CDC officials know that something's going on. He'll be fine.

Being Atlanta, every television station somehow was usurped by CNN. Round the clock coverage. We were trying to tune it out, advocates and government officals alike, suddenly friends, stuck in a crappy hotel lobby most of us from New York and DC.

Then the second name. I saw it flash across the ticker, Bear Trap was on flight 93.

This time, I couldn't pull it together. I still hate Atlanta, but I have to give my thanks to Joan, Chris and John. They pulled me away and pushed a shot of whiskey and a beer into my hands. Somehow, they even got me to laugh, they're still special people.

So yeah, I hate this day. I hate reliving it. I hate the sucker-punch in the gut when I see the first flag at half-mast. I hate the media and the government and the patriots for ripping open a wound every year that still hasn't comepletely healed. I don't think it ever will.

I miss ya Uncle G. I miss ya Mark.

I know you guys aren't coming back and that I have my memories.

I'm still 'with you'!

You

You're the one who asked me out, who pursued me, who made my day brighter.

You're the one who stole kisses that first night.

You're the one who I hobbled out to see three days after knee surgery because your mom had passed away and you needed to see a "comforting face."

You're the one who had a "hectic weekend" and broke our plans but wanted to get together this week.

You're the one that I was allowing to come into my heart.

You're the one who on Tuesday sent an email, that you just wanted to be friends.

Today, you're the one professing your love for the new guy.

You're an asshole.

It's Done

Well, last Thursday I had the big cut to take me to lucky knee surgery #14. I had always considered 13 to be my lucky number. It was my soccer jersey worn through high school and college play and my last surgery was actually in 2001. I made it 7 whole years before colliding with a wet manhole cover and slipping to catch the asphalt (which isn't so conducive to sliding).

Anywho, I'm back in action somewhat and have at least managed to lose the crutches but the hobbling goes slowly.

The good news is that I've only had to take a couple of the prescription pain-killers, so for the right price they could be yours.

I'm Kidding, I'm kidding! They'll eventually go the way of dead goldfish, adding to the DC watershed pharmacy. Hope to see you guys out and about.

Cheers

Live and Let Live, Or Not

I consider myself a pretty laid back kind of guy. I rarely get really worked up over petty issues and it takes a lot to really piss me off, but be forewarned, when you do, I strike in typical Scorpio fashion. I strike to kill.

That being said, there's an individual at my workplace that's kinda set me off. Sadly I know that he's probably plain ignorant, but seriously, what fool get's a tattoo of the German Flag and eagle insignia on your left forearm!

Now this probably wouldn't offend the majority out there, but I'm a member of the Hebrew Tribe and sadly my grandparents sported tattoos on their left forearms as well, vivid and daily reminders of their time spent in the Concentration Camps at Neiderhagen. Fortunately, the were never shipped further on to Auschwitz and were liberated by the Americans on April 2, 1945.

Really? You're gonna get a tattoo of the German Flag and Eagle on your left forearm and not expect some people to get a little pissy? Yeah Mister, you can tell me it's all about your support for the German Soccer Team and how well the played in Euro 2008, but for me it's all about your ingnorance and a systematic hate that wiped out most of my family.

So it seems we're at an impass Mister Co-Worker, you're tattoo can't go away, and it can't bring back my family, but just know, you're now on notice, because like I said, I can be laid back, but you're dangerously close to that level of annoyance, when I strike.

Concert Time

Back in March I posted about my new girl crushes Chandra and Leigh Watson. Well children, they've just released their debut album and are kicking of a US tour tonight in DC at the Rock and Roll Hotel.

I'm totally going to hear some rocking music. Y'all come out and join.